What a whirl wind of a few weeks. But by now I'm just ready to chop the things off and move on with life.
The decision to do the bilateral, was never that hard for me. My gut had been saying all along to just "double down". For obvious reasons of cancer coming back, cutting out the constant worry and also for symmetry. I don't want them to look different and have to deal with that my entire life. And for the family chart we figured out. Everyone who had singles - cancer came back and they lost their fight. Doubles are still living. Also, most people I have talked to, more people regret the lumpectomy/single mastectomy. I haven't talked to someone yet that regrets getting the mastectomy. (I'm sure there are, but I haven't met you). I'm a big believer in signs and the universe having my back. So I took that one as a big one. Case Solved.
So far what we know of now.
Oh, and the tumor will now be referred to as "Clawrilla" - hence it looks like an evil claw.
- My MRI shows I'm more like Stage 2. Since the tumor (Clawrilla) looks to be 2.2-2.5 cm. In between the size of a nickel and quarter. It is not symmetrical and has a tail, so I think the size is wonky anyways.
- Clawrilla is Estrogen and Progesterone Positive. Which is a good thing. It just shows what the cancer is feeding off of. Which is better to treat me after and later in life. Hormone therapy! yay!
- Clawrilla is HER2 negative. Also a good thing. Not as aggressive and lesser chances of needing chemo
- My MRI, 3D mammogram, and more ultrasounds show that my lymph nodes look pretty good and it doesn't look like it has spread. (but won't know for sure until after surgery)
- Clawrilla is Grade 2 cancer. Not the innocent kind, not the agressive kind but in the middle.
- I have a big family history of breast and ovarian cancer (I'm actually the 10th in my family line)
So what does all this mean, it kind of means, I'm in the average/medium breast cancer that everyone gets. It isn't highly aggressive yet, but it also isn't brand spankin' new. All normal, well except my age, me being 30 puts me in the 1% group. In all honesty, I'd rather be in the other 1% that the rest of the US complains about.
And yes, I mentioned chemo, I won't know if I need chemo or radiation until after the surgery. After they check my lymph nodes and my full pathology report comes in.
Now for the right team. This is all a big decision. As I'm not that worried about this cancer right now, I'm more worried about it returning later in life...somewhere else. So I obviously want the right team to make sure that doesn't happen. And two, the right team that I trust and am happy to be around. After second, third, fourth, and even unwanted opinions from friends in the community, friends in the field, doctors, surgeons, people who have lived through this, etc. I figured since (you see me quoting this now) "It is early, treatable and doesn't look that bad," (knock on wood) I wanted comfort and trust to play a big role in my team. Yes if I had something more aggressive and abnormal I would be running to the best in the land. But from what I hear, I'm pretty normal - in the breast cancer world. (again knock on wood)
Some of the best advice I also got, was go with the best for right now, you can't plan for the unknown.
When it comes down to it, you have to do your own research, dig deep to understand what you have, research the best, research the worst, put all options on the table, be open minded....THEN GO WITH YOUR GUT.
Double Down with Jones on the 8th.
Hopeful for the win and to never return!
Tata sweet Tatas.